A Privilege and a Challenge

After a game. We take this picture every time.

Watching our daughter navigate the college recruiting process has been one of the proudest and most emotional experiences I have had as her mom.

For years, soccer was simply something she loved. It was early mornings, late night practices, long drives, muddy cleats, sore muscles, and countless weekends spent cheering from the sidelines. It was watching her celebrate great games and helping her through the difficult ones. Somewhere along the way, those ordinary moments began building toward an extraordinary opportunity: the chance to play soccer in college.

There is no question that being recruited is a privilege. It represents years of hard work, discipline, sacrifice, and commitment. It means coaches see something special in her, not only in the way she plays, but also in the person and teammate she has become. As her mom, it has been incredibly emotional to watch others recognize the qualities we have always seen in her.

I have felt so much pride watching her dreams begin to take shape. At the same time, I have watched excitement mix with pressure, confidence with uncertainty, and gratitude with fear.

Because privilege does not mean the process is easy.

Big dreams at sixteen

She has always found her greatest joy on the soccer field, competing alongside her teammates and playing the game she loves. Over the years, that passion grew into much bigger dreams. She began imagining herself playing college soccer, competing for an NCAA national championship, and perhaps continuing to pursue the game even after college. At the same time, she dreams of a career beyond the field.

Those are enormous goals for a sixteen year old girl.

Through the recruiting process, she was being asked to do far more than choose a college. She was trying to understand how soccer, education, career aspirations, and the person she hopes to become could all fit together. How does someone so young create a plan for dreams that may shape the rest of her life? How does she choose a place that will challenge her as an athlete, prepare her academically, and give her the opportunity to pursue everything she envisions?

The college decision is difficult for almost every teenager. For a student athlete, the questions begin earlier and carry additional weight. The school must offer the right academic path, but the team culture, coaching philosophy, playing style, roster needs, location, and opportunities for growth also matter. A decision that is already deeply personal suddenly depends on dozens of moving pieces.

At sixteen, she was expected to look years into the future while still discovering who she is today.

The emotions people do not always see

From the outside, recruiting can look exciting and glamorous. People see the coach conversations, campus visits, camp invitations, and commitment announcements. They see a young athlete being given an opportunity she worked hard to earn.

What they may not see are the quiet moments afterward.

They do not see a teenage girl sitting at the kitchen table trying to understand what a coach really meant. They do not see her checking her phone and hoping for a response. They do not see the disappointment when an email goes unanswered or the anxiety that can surface when another player commits. They do not see how quickly excitement can turn into uncertainty.

Every email feels important. Every showcase feels like an evaluation. Every conversation can feel as though it might change the direction of her future.

And through all of it, she still has homework to complete, tests to study for, friendships to maintain, practices to attend, and all the ordinary emotions that come with being a junior in high school.

As her mom, I felt many of those emotions alongside her. I celebrated the exciting calls and encouraging messages, but I also felt the silence and the disappointment. There were moments when I wanted to take the weight from her completely. I wanted to tell her exactly what to do, which school to choose, and how every decision would turn out.

That is what parents want to do. We want to protect our children from disappointment and make the difficult parts easier.

But I could not make this decision for her.

My role was to help her ask the right questions, remind her of her worth, and give her a safe place to say the things she might not say to anyone else. I had to learn when to offer advice and when to simply listen. I had to trust the young woman we had raised, even when part of me still saw the little girl in oversized cleats.

When our kitchen table became recruiting headquarters

Our kitchen table became the center of the recruiting process. It was covered with school lists, coach names, screenshots, schedules, email drafts, camp information, and notes from conversations. At one point, we were trying to track approximately forty schools while also managing showcases, ID camps, highlight videos, follow ups, and constantly changing levels of interest.

We were grateful, but we were also overwhelmed.

There was no single place that showed her what she needed to do next or helped us understand whether we were on the right track. The information existed, but it was scattered across spreadsheets, emails, text messages, websites, social media, and handwritten notes. We were always afraid something important might be missed.

As parents, we also faced a delicate balance. We wanted her to take ownership of her recruiting journey, but we needed enough visibility to support her. We did not want every conversation to begin with questions such as, “Did you email that coach?” or “Did anyone respond?” Constant requests for updates could make an already stressful process feel even heavier.

We needed a way to remain involved without taking over.

Why we created HustlPlay

That kitchen table is why HustlPlay exists. We wanted to build the thing we kept looking for and could not find: one place that shows a player where she is, what is coming next, and what she can do about it. Justin has written about how that came together.

What matters most to me is the part that is easy to miss. HustlPlay does not choose for her. It gives her the structure to choose for herself, and that is a different thing entirely.

A better way for parents to stay connected

HustlPlay also recognizes that recruiting is an emotional journey for parents.

We want to know how our daughters are doing. We want to understand which schools they are considering, whether coaches are responding, what events are coming up, and where they may need help. But we do not want them to feel as though we are constantly checking on them or demanding another update.

Through a connected parent account, parents can check progress, see upcoming activities, and understand where their daughter is in the process without pestering her for information. It creates a healthier balance, allowing the player to remain in control of her journey while giving her parents enough visibility to provide support when she needs it.

HustlPlay helps parents step back without feeling disconnected. It helps daughters move forward without feeling alone. It creates a shared sense of direction while protecting the independence and trust that are so important during this stage of life.

More than a college decision

The recruiting process is about much more than earning a roster spot. It teaches a young athlete how to communicate with adults, manage disappointment, evaluate opportunities, ask difficult questions, and trust her instincts. It asks her to think carefully about what she values and what kind of person she wants to become.

There is also a quiet sadness in watching your child choose her future. Every opportunity represents a new life, but every decision also closes the door on another possibility. Even the right choice can carry a sense of loss. It is a reminder that childhood is changing, and that the little girl who once needed you for everything is learning to choose her own path.

I will always be proud of the soccer player our daughter has become. But I am even more proud of the young woman who learned to navigate uncertainty, speak for herself, and make a decision rooted in her own goals and values.

If your family is beginning this journey, HustlPlay can help you move from overwhelmed to intentional, one step at a time.

The recruiting process asked my teenage daughter to make an adult decision before she could possibly know every version of the person she will become.

That was the challenge.

The privilege was watching her discover that she was capable of making it.